Cold Hearted Bitch

My sister has been having some troubles with her boyfriend. About 3 months after they started dating, he was pressuring her to move in with him, and for the past 8 months she has 'unofficially' been living there (basically living there, only not paying rent... SCORE!). Anyway, from the beginning he has been smitten with her... except, I am not entirely sure he liked her... just the idea of her.

Regardless, after a year of 'I love you' and 'You would make an amazing wife and mother', it has turned into 'I am confused', and 'I need some time'. Basically all the douchey things guys say when they know they want to break up, but don't have the balls to say it, so they drag it out for a month while the girl is left in limbo, wondering if the last year of her life was wasted on this jackass.

As always, everything comes back to me (because this is my blog)... and I am left picking up the pieces and having the same conversation with her, which basically consists of me reassuring her she did nothing wrong and he is just an idiot. Anyway, this has been going on for about 2 months and I've had enough. I can not listen to another word about this guy. I just don't care anymore. As soon as she says his name, I stop listening. I am pretty sure this is super rude and insensitive but I can't bring myself to pretend like I am interested anymore.

It also doesn't help that I can't stand the guy. I want to punch him in the neck when he talks. He thinks he is so much smarter than anyone around him (which he probably is, in most cases), and he has gotten used to basically making shit up. I think that he has gone for so long without anyone calling bullshit on his 'stories' that he doesn't even think twice about COMPLETELY making them up. The first time I met him, he casually told me the most ridiculous story about 'knowing' that Tim Horton's puts an addictive ingredient in their coffee to 'hook' their customers (it's called caffeine idiot). He spoke like he was reading the bible or something, and as if he whole-heartedly believed every single word. Anyway, I called bullshit... and explained the 12 reasons why this was the most stupid thing I'd ever heard. I don't think he likes me too much, but really...I am not going to nod vigorously and say 'ohhhhh! I didn't know that!' when he obviously made up some sort of story to excuse his drinking 5 double doubles' a day. What a douche.

#14 I love snow. LOVE it. I can't imagine living somewhere where it is sunny everyday. I mean, it is nice to vacation in paradise, but no one wants to live there.

Growing up... blah blah blah.

My best friend just got engaged. I knew it was coming. I've known for about 3 months that he bought her a ring and was planning to propose this summer. Even with ample warning, I am still kind of in denial. I am super happy for them, and considering that her fiance is pretty much the male version of me, I totally approved of him. However, I am finding it totally bizarre.

It is not like I don't want them to get married... or that I think they shouldn't get married...
It is more like I am thinking about how this will affect ME.

I am having visions of the next 10 years, and I am a little concerned about it. I know they don't plan on living in the city we are in after they get married. Actually, I am pretty sure they are planning a pretty big move, far, far away from here (like an 8 hour plane ride). I don't like this. I fully support them starting a new life and you know... having kids *shudder*, but the fact that she is SO excited about it makes me feel weird.

I still have panic attacks when I think of being responsible for anyone other than myself.... or even committing myself to someone else. I am totally going to be that 'aunt' that flies through their house every 6 months talking about the fire ritual I experienced in Fiji, or who backpacked around the world for 2 years.

I have no problem being this person, but it terrifies me to think that maybe E and I will not be as close as we've been. I hate growing up.

#13 If I could choose a super power, it would be to stop time at will. I would love it.

Strange behaviour (I'm Canadian, shut up about the spelling)

I am beginning to think I am a hypochondriac. Although, I am not sure you can be called a hypochondriac if you are ACTUALLY experiencing the symptoms. I am pretty sure that I am suffering from at least 3 serious illnesses. Maybe 4. If I don’t blog for a while, don’t be too concerned, I’m probably just dead.

#12 I do not like orange flavoured anything. Except oranges themselves… (which oddly enough, I have been forbidden to eat due to odd side effects….I know). Wait. That is a lie. I like orange crush Slurpee's. I also like orange juice. Okay, let’s change that to orange flavoured anything, barring liquids. Yes. I think that will work.

Confidence is....

OM- 'I am going to get ripped apart when boss gets back'

Me- 'Well you will look good in comparison to me... I haven't gotten anything done in the last 3 weeks!' (not for lack of trying unfortunately)

OM- 'I doubt it. I have been working on this for 3 months and it is still not very good. I don't understand how I can do this unless I meet with him and he is never here!'

Me- 'uh huh. Totally understand.'

OM- 'I mean he was standing behind me in line for coffee, and didn't say anything to me. When I turned around, he said he didn't recognize me. Now don't tell me he doesn't recognize my ass.'

Me- ......

It is not like I think she can't be proud of her ass, but it was still a bizarre conversation to have with someone who could be my mother.


#11 If you tell me an outrageous story, I am immediately inclined to believe it ..... even if you completely made it up. However, approximately one hour after hearing said story, I will likely realize that I am the most gullible person ever.

Chemistry sucks.

I was working in the lab today and something went awry. I don't exactly know what yet, but blogging about it, rather than figuring it out seemed to make perfect sense.

For those of you who are not familiar with chemistry, I will put this in layman's terms.
If you add a certain substance (A) with another substance (B) you will get a product (C).
In my case, there are three reactants... 2 of them are air and water.
So I do my thing and expect that my product (C) will have a component in it (from the reaction) that will react with another substance (D) that is prepared separately.
Upon adding D to C, nothing happened. Weird.
I tried it again, this time waiting for an hour before adding D. And..... Nothing.
Thinking my D was not mixed properly, I added it to something else which surely had some C in it and it reacted, so now I know the problem is not with D.
The problem is with C.

Now, to my predicament.
My entire thesis is hanging in the balance right now. My whole project is based on the A+B=C; C+D=E. E gets analysed and then I go on my merry way.

Well.

If A+B does not work. I don't know how the hell to do the experiments that I've been planning for the past 6 months.
I know this reaction should work. I know my method should work. I know that it has been done time and time again. So I am sitting here trying to think about what I could have possibly done wrong... and all I can think is What. The. Fuck.

I think that my lab should be the subject of my thesis. Titled 'Room 319: the only place in the universe where chemistry does not work'. Okay, so that title is lame. I'll work on it.

Excuse me while I hyperventilate.

#10 I believe that men should not have a say regarding the legality of abortion. There is no way that anyone can understand making a decision like that without actually experiencing it. It is easy to tell someone they can't do something 'because it is wrong' if there is no possibility of yourself ever being faced with that decision. (This is not to say that I think the choice to have an abortion should be entirely up to the woman...)