Time- 1998.
During the class president nomination 'ceremony' of my grade 8 class, I was nominated. Flattered, and somewhat surprised, I accepted the nomination and campaigned for the presidency. I won. And then we had recess. During that 15 minutes, I was accused of 'buying' votes from my classmates and being 'pushed' in by the teacher because he wanted a girl on the committee (by the opposition). Keep in mind, these were a bunch of 13 year olds. The opposition was an interesting fellow.... one who most people either did not know or did not like, yet most of the students believed him. Less than one hour later, 5 people were in the Principal's office (including myself), no less than 3 kids were crying (including myself) and one person got suspended for 2 days (not me). I resigned as president the next day.
This is the first memory I have of realizing how much influence one person can have, regardless of their position in the group.
Anyway, I dreamt about this last night. It was weird.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Thursday, December 21, 2006
All the hustle and bussle...
So I attempted the impossible today. Christmas shopping.
Between dodging screaming children rolling down the mall, feeling like I wanted to run over every pedestrian who walked in front of my car, and the grouchiness of my sister, I didn't accomplish much at all. Normally I can deal with the bitchiness of all the customers, the need for other people to nudge you over while looking at something, and even the kids being their annoying selves. However, when my sister asked to come along because she had a few things to pick up, and the afternoon turns into me standing around in ridiculous shops waiting for her and constantly saying 'No, I think that skirt is cute' or 'Why don't you just try it on' or 'Yes, I think that colour would look fine on you', I left feeling exhausted, frustrated and completely defeated.
Nothing that a bottle of red wine, national lampoons christmas vacation and the purchase of a beautiful leather bag can't fix. Maybe tomorrow....
Between dodging screaming children rolling down the mall, feeling like I wanted to run over every pedestrian who walked in front of my car, and the grouchiness of my sister, I didn't accomplish much at all. Normally I can deal with the bitchiness of all the customers, the need for other people to nudge you over while looking at something, and even the kids being their annoying selves. However, when my sister asked to come along because she had a few things to pick up, and the afternoon turns into me standing around in ridiculous shops waiting for her and constantly saying 'No, I think that skirt is cute' or 'Why don't you just try it on' or 'Yes, I think that colour would look fine on you', I left feeling exhausted, frustrated and completely defeated.
Nothing that a bottle of red wine, national lampoons christmas vacation and the purchase of a beautiful leather bag can't fix. Maybe tomorrow....
Saturday, December 16, 2006
D-Day
Well... the exam is over.
Was it the worse test I've ever written? No.
Was it the best? Not even close.
Was it impossibly long for the time allotment? Yes.
Did someone start to cry? No... but I was close.
Was it because I was tired and frustrated and confused? Yes.
Is it going to dictate the rest of my academic career? Probably not.
Did I look like someone ran over me with a car when I finished? Probably.
Did I start calculating my mark before I had finished the exam to see what my mark would be if I just got up and left? Yes.... 3 times.
Am I obsessing over this class because it will finally make my supervisor see what an idiot I am? Yes.
Am I listening to Damien Rice, feeling sorry for myself because I don't want to work on my project and presentation (which just happens to be due on Tuesday....)? Yes.
Do I need to stop asking questions and answering them like this? Definitely.
Was it the worse test I've ever written? No.
Was it the best? Not even close.
Was it impossibly long for the time allotment? Yes.
Did someone start to cry? No... but I was close.
Was it because I was tired and frustrated and confused? Yes.
Is it going to dictate the rest of my academic career? Probably not.
Did I look like someone ran over me with a car when I finished? Probably.
Did I start calculating my mark before I had finished the exam to see what my mark would be if I just got up and left? Yes.... 3 times.
Am I obsessing over this class because it will finally make my supervisor see what an idiot I am? Yes.
Am I listening to Damien Rice, feeling sorry for myself because I don't want to work on my project and presentation (which just happens to be due on Tuesday....)? Yes.
Do I need to stop asking questions and answering them like this? Definitely.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
As visions of partial differential equations danced through my head
Well... the day after tomorrow is my exam. I have never, in my life, studied this much for an exam. If I get in there and he asks irrelevant questions that only somewhat relate to the material we have taken, then I might actually have a nervous breakdown. Right there...in the exam. I will have a full out temper tantrum with throwing fists and stomping feet... the whole nine yards.
On a lighter note. Christmas is coming. I love christmas. I love the lights, the snow, the food, the games....
I just hate the parties. I don't really understand the purpose of them. Work employees getting together for some bonding.... it is not like they spend 40+ hours a week together already. And why not? add some alcohol to the mix and see what happens! Never a good idea. Really.
I have gone to 3 parties thus far... all of them horrible. Mostly small talk of 'crazy weather we've been having hey?' or 'tough break for the university football team' or 'I know.... I've been feeling a little congested too... flu season, you know'. As you can probably tell, I suck at small talk. I can not feel out a co-workers 'significant other' in 10 minutes to decide what I can and can not say to them....and I can not engage in any witty banter with people who I despise or imagine physically hurting them on a regular basis. The worst thing about christmas parties?!?!?! They are mandatory. Maybe not officially, but unofficially? Definitely.
On a lighter note. Christmas is coming. I love christmas. I love the lights, the snow, the food, the games....
I just hate the parties. I don't really understand the purpose of them. Work employees getting together for some bonding.... it is not like they spend 40+ hours a week together already. And why not? add some alcohol to the mix and see what happens! Never a good idea. Really.
I have gone to 3 parties thus far... all of them horrible. Mostly small talk of 'crazy weather we've been having hey?' or 'tough break for the university football team' or 'I know.... I've been feeling a little congested too... flu season, you know'. As you can probably tell, I suck at small talk. I can not feel out a co-workers 'significant other' in 10 minutes to decide what I can and can not say to them....and I can not engage in any witty banter with people who I despise or imagine physically hurting them on a regular basis. The worst thing about christmas parties?!?!?! They are mandatory. Maybe not officially, but unofficially? Definitely.
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Conspiricy theory
I have become aware of the fact that not only will I need to convince my supervisory committee that I deserve my masters (when I defend) but EVERYONE in my boss's research group. I became privy to some information yesterday about a previous student who was 'really really stupid' who had got their masters a few months ago. Anyway, apparently everyone in the research group was really pissed that they let her defend because she didn't 'do' any of her research on her own or something. No mercy people. There is no mercy here.
Okay, so for Christmas, usually my sisters and parents get together and just chill for most of the day, eating, scrabble, poker....you know, the usual. Also, my extended family gets together for a potluck type thing (which usually extends into the wee hours of the morning...). Anyway, this year, both of my sisters have new boyfriends that are coming for this. Of course, I do not have a boyfriend....and I have also not met either one of their boyfriends yet. hmmmm. I have decided that I am going to become the loser sister who goes to family Christmas functions alone. Perfect.
A conversation I had this morning at the Tim Hortons Drive through:
Voice through teller: Hi. Can I take your order?
Me- Hi. Um, just a large black coffee and an old fashioned sugar donut.
extended silence
Voice- So that was a raspberry shot in coffee with no foam?!
Me- ummmm no. *enunciating way too much* LARGE BLACK COFFEE and an old fashioned sugar donut
another long silence
Voice-sorry. So we like, don't make the sugar donuts at this location.
Me- uhhhh well I'm pretty sure that you do.
Voice- (understandably annoyed) NO, we don't actually.
Me- um well okay, just the coffee then.
Voice- that will be $5.35
Me- A large coffee costs $1.45
Voice- You wanted a raspberry shot with no foam.
Me- No, I wanted a large black coffee. As in, NO RASPBERRY ANYTHING.
Voice- $1.45- please pull ahead.
Now, since not even the most hearing impaired person can possibly get 'raspberry' anything from 'large black coffee', I am pretty sure she meant to get my order wrong. Also, I am beginning to think that this is a Tim Horton's ploy to upgrade customers who only order coffee to pay more. I know I almost agreed with the girl because I wanted to stop the madness.
I was also unimpressed when I saw a woman exit the building with an old fashioned sugar donut. Obviously she gave in and agreed to get the raspberry shot.
Okay, so for Christmas, usually my sisters and parents get together and just chill for most of the day, eating, scrabble, poker....you know, the usual. Also, my extended family gets together for a potluck type thing (which usually extends into the wee hours of the morning...). Anyway, this year, both of my sisters have new boyfriends that are coming for this. Of course, I do not have a boyfriend....and I have also not met either one of their boyfriends yet. hmmmm. I have decided that I am going to become the loser sister who goes to family Christmas functions alone. Perfect.
A conversation I had this morning at the Tim Hortons Drive through:
Voice through teller: Hi. Can I take your order?
Me- Hi. Um, just a large black coffee and an old fashioned sugar donut.
extended silence
Voice- So that was a raspberry shot in coffee with no foam?!
Me- ummmm no. *enunciating way too much* LARGE BLACK COFFEE and an old fashioned sugar donut
another long silence
Voice-sorry. So we like, don't make the sugar donuts at this location.
Me- uhhhh well I'm pretty sure that you do.
Voice- (understandably annoyed) NO, we don't actually.
Me- um well okay, just the coffee then.
Voice- that will be $5.35
Me- A large coffee costs $1.45
Voice- You wanted a raspberry shot with no foam.
Me- No, I wanted a large black coffee. As in, NO RASPBERRY ANYTHING.
Voice- $1.45- please pull ahead.
Now, since not even the most hearing impaired person can possibly get 'raspberry' anything from 'large black coffee', I am pretty sure she meant to get my order wrong. Also, I am beginning to think that this is a Tim Horton's ploy to upgrade customers who only order coffee to pay more. I know I almost agreed with the girl because I wanted to stop the madness.
I was also unimpressed when I saw a woman exit the building with an old fashioned sugar donut. Obviously she gave in and agreed to get the raspberry shot.
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