My best friend just got engaged. I knew it was coming. I've known for about 3 months that he bought her a ring and was planning to propose this summer. Even with ample warning, I am still kind of in denial. I am super happy for them, and considering that her fiance is pretty much the male version of me, I totally approved of him. However, I am finding it totally bizarre.
It is not like I don't want them to get married... or that I think they shouldn't get married...
It is more like I am thinking about how this will affect ME.
I am having visions of the next 10 years, and I am a little concerned about it. I know they don't plan on living in the city we are in after they get married. Actually, I am pretty sure they are planning a pretty big move, far, far away from here (like an 8 hour plane ride). I don't like this. I fully support them starting a new life and you know... having kids *shudder*, but the fact that she is SO excited about it makes me feel weird.
I still have panic attacks when I think of being responsible for anyone other than myself.... or even committing myself to someone else. I am totally going to be that 'aunt' that flies through their house every 6 months talking about the fire ritual I experienced in Fiji, or who backpacked around the world for 2 years.
I have no problem being this person, but it terrifies me to think that maybe E and I will not be as close as we've been. I hate growing up.
#13 If I could choose a super power, it would be to stop time at will. I would love it.
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