I hate computers

I think I have mentioned in the past that I do not have a good relationship with computers. Maybe it is my electrostatic charged being that throws the programs out of whack when I touch the keyboard... or maybe just that I have no patience to try and understand things like:

'Your computer has experienced a fatal error, to fix the problem you will need to defragment the mainframe memory patch board and reconfigure the portal device used to connect your notebook to the central system'

[NOTE: I have no idea if this is actually a possible error. I just made up it up using random words that I have read in error messages]

Regardless, the above statement (or variation there of) accompanied with the sound effect that sounds like a hybrid of a 'BOP', 'DING', and 'THWAP' is one of the most irritating things I can think of.

I spent 3 friggin hours trying to set up a feature on my computer that would not require me to constantly back up my work manually. Seriously, it should have taken me like 10 minutes. I am not computer illiterate, nor am I a complete idiot; so you are probably wondering 'what the hell is wrong with this girl?'

Well, if windows didn't have approximately 70 thousand different versions, I would have been able to figure out what the hell was going on. Instead I had to go on to some sort of online community and feel like a total idiot because I am the visitor who asks a question that is pretty much the same caliber as someone asking 'how do you peel a banana?'

Anyway, less than 45 seconds after I posted the question, I got a reply. Seriously.... 45 seconds. Some guy read my question, thought up a response and posted back in FORTY-FIVE seconds! Who are these people!? I was about 10 minutes away from throwing my computer on the floor and dancing on it interspersed with pouring hot coffee all over it...and this guy answers the question in less than one minute. Infuriating!

I also think it is a little ironic that I am talking about how much I hate computers, on a computer which is connected to billions of other computers. If I don't post for a while, it is because my computer has conspired with other computers to steal my identity/erase me.
It happened to Sandra Bullock in The Net, and that was like 15 years ago. Just imagine the possibilities.

#7 In high school, one of my best friends boyfriend wrote me a love poem. I never told her about it, and soon afterwards, she lost her virginity to him. I still haven't told her about it, and I stopped talking to her boyfriend. (they are now broken up)